If I had a drink, for every awful pick-up line that came from your mouth, I'd be drunker, and you'd look better.
If I make a smoothie, will lesbians come to my yard? Because milkshakes bring the boys and I don't want that.
(Haven't I seen you someplace before?) Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
When we're together I'd rather you stared at my boobs than your phone.
If you had to be one household appliance, what would it be? I'd be a washing machine cause that's probably the only way I'd get a girls panties wet.
I'm gonna have sex with you, you, and you. Alright, who's first?
Bond. James Bond.
Damn Girl, your ass is bigger than my future!
You look like my first wife. Her: "How many wives have you had?" You: None yet.
Guy walking up and touching girl: Thank God, I thought that you were only an illusion