How can you be from an ice planet when you're so Hoth?
Hey pretty, do you wanna date me? Yes=Smile. No=Backflip.
I don't know much about pies, but you sure do know how to make my banana cream.
I want to be the reason you look down at your phone and smile. Then walk into a pole.
My psychiatrist sent me for an MRI because she thinks I have a magnetic personality.
Do you want to come over to my place and feed your beaver some wood?
Do you wanna see a magic trick? Watch me pull something out of my pants!
My love is like communism; everyone gets a share, and it's only good in theory.
Team Jennifer or Team Jolie?
I have a rare disease that will kill me unless I have sex within the next 30 minutes.