My wife doesn't understand me.
Damn Girl, your ass is bigger than my future!
You know, if we cut your arms off, you'd look just like Venus de Milo.
The fact that I'm missing my teeth just means that there's more room for your tongue.
Do you work at Dick's? Cause you're sporting the goods.
Roses are red, grass is greener, when I think of you I touch my weiner.
I miss you even when I'm not horny.
Do you play volleyball? Because you look like your good on ur knees!
Excuse me, do you have sex when you first meet somebody? [No.] Alright, I'll see you tomorrow.
I just finished a round of golf, wanna be my 19th hole today?