Fu*k me if I'm wrong, but have we met before?
May I use your phone? I want to call my mom and tell her I found the love of my life.
Lower your expectations and let's begin.
Are your legs tired? Because you're really fat.
I see you have a dog collar. Will you be my bitch?
Do you like the band 7 Seconds? Cuz that's how long I last, baby.
How many expensive seafood dinners would it take for you to be my personal bedroom acrobat for many years to come?
Are you being a ghost for Halloween, or are you just my boo?
I want you to know that I have clean bed sheets at home.
Remember my name. You'll be screaming it later.