May I borrow your phone? (Why?) I want to call your mother and thank her for bringing you into this world.
I didn't mean to ogle you, but I'd sure like to Google you.
When Santa saw you he came early.
If a piece of paper meant "sexy," then you'd be a forest!
Ay girl, You must be exothermic, because I think you're hot.
Are you from Narnia? Cause you sure make my lion roar.
If I told you I had a 2 inch dick would you f**k me? [No] Good, because mine is 8 inches.
If you ever need to get rid of a trojan, don't hesitate to call me!
Follow me on Instagram? (Jk I just wanted to stalk your selfies)
Whats the difference between you and the Grinch? The Grinch stole Christmas, and you stole my heart.