That skeleton over there said he'd get your number for me, but he didn't have the guts, so here I am.
How about you be my story and I'll be your climax?
Hey girl, wanna blow my trombone?
I'm trying to determine after years of therapy and lots of testing, whether or not I'm allergic to sex.
My psychiatrist sent me for an MRI because she thinks I have a magnetic personality.
Girl, are you a cop? [No] Cause you're America's Finest.
(Take a photo of her) I want to show my mom what my next girlfriend looks like.
Do you sleep on your stomach? [No.] Can I?
I may not be vampire, but I sure know how to suck.
It's a good thing you've got evaporative cooling, cause i'm gonna make you sweat.