I want to be the reason you look down at your phone and smile. Then walk into a pole.
Those are very heavy can I hold them for you?
If you were a basketball, I'd never shoot. [Why?] Because I'd always miss you.
I will stop loving you when an apple grows from a mango tree on the 30th of February.
Did it hurt…when you fell from heaven? Because I know a good personal injury lawyer.
Do you work at McDonalds? Cuz I want u to be in my happy-meal!
My sudden protracted cardiac arrhythmia tells me I love you.
Twinkle twinkle little star,
let's have sex inside my car.
Do you remember me? [No.] Oh that's right, we've only met in my dreams.
Do you want to have good sex? [No!] Well then come to my place!