I wish you were Broadband, so I could get high-speed access.
I think Pythagorean Theorem won't work on you. You're so damn acute.
You've got more curves than a triple integral.
Your boxing model is much better than IE6's.
You lack of a Facebook photo makes me wonder if you're shy, a wanted criminal, or just intensely unattractive.
Your exquisite breasts have exacerbated my asthma.
You're the top trending topic in the Twitter feed of my heart.
Excuse me, but did you happen to find my Nobel Peace Prize?
Let's relax tonight by spending two hours trying to find something to watch on Netflix.