You were hoping to get a goodnight kiss? I was hoping to get goodnight laid.
I don't know how to put this, but I'm kind of a big deal.
Charles Dickens might have given you Great Expectations, but I can meet them.
I like your plaid spandex pants, but I like myself in them better.
Wanna see my 12-inch elf?
You're only a riot grrl cuz you haven't experienced me yet.
My head isn't the only thing completely shaved.
Wanna carve the anarchy symbol on each other?
I was hesitant to message you because of how pointy your elbows are. I caved in and messaged you because I'm trying to better myself and become less discriminating. So I'm willing to give you a shot, pointy elbows and all.
I would do fifty shades of bad things to you.