Would you like to come to my place and light my Yule log?
I've got the keys to the sleigh tonight.
Are you interested in seeing the "North Pole"?
Come and sit on my knee and I'll play Bad Santa.
Do you wanna taste my Christmas cookie?
Want some of my eggnog?
You can be Santa's helper...
I want to have your children and lie to them about Santa.
I know today isn't Christmas because when I woke up, you weren't under my tree.
I'd ride that sleigh!