Hey girl, I've been warming up this bench for you MY WHOLE LIFE.
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I'm trying to quit smoking, wanna give me a new oral fixation?
I like Legos, you like Legos, why don't we build a relationship?
I'm not trying to impress you or anything, but... I'm Batman!
Do I know you? (No.) That's a shame, I'd sure like to.
Please tell your tits to stop looking at my eyes.
I love you like a drunk girl loves yelling that she's sober at 3am while lying on the floor of a Taco Bell.
Even if it wasn't cold out, my nipples would still be erect when I'm near you.
Let's go on a date to see how expensive everything has gotten since we were actually single.
You look like my first wife. Her: "How many wives have you had?" You: None yet.
If you were an element, you'd be Francium, because you're the most attractive.