Were you in Boy Scouts? Because you sure have tied my heart in a knot.
My love for you is like the energizer bunny, it keeps going and going...
It's dark in here. Wait! It's because all of the light is shining on you.
Did it hurt…when you fell from heaven? Because I know a good personal injury lawyer.
Let's drag out this excruciatingly ill-fated romance until there isn't even a remote possibility of salvaging a friendship.
You have such a nice smile! I haven't seen any... for at least two hours.
Have you ever kissed a rabbit between the ears? [Pull your pockets inside out] Would you like to?
Hold out two fingers and say: Why should a woman masturbate with these two fingers? (I don't know.) Cause they're mine sweetheart.
♡
I love you like a drunk girl loves yelling that she's sober at 3am while lying on the floor of a Taco Bell.