Did you swallow a magnet? Because you're attractive.
Consider this your two-minute warning... before I kiss you.
Reasons to Date a Hockey Player:
1. They Always Wear Protection
2. They Have Great Hands
3. They Are Used To Scoring
4. They Have Great Stamina
5. They Find The Opening And Get It In
6. They Never Miss The Target
7. They Know How To Use Their Wood
8. They Have Long Sticks
9. They Know When To Play Rough
10. Because Baseball Players Only Know How To Hit Balls
My perfect date: I pick you up in my Hyundai Sonata. You get in, there are candles lit in the car. You say, isn't that dangerous? I say, yes, but I like danger. We go to your favorite restaurant and have a fantastic meal. We come outside to see my car is on fire. You go, Trevor, aren't you pissed; your car is on fire! I pull out a bag of marshmallows and say nah I knew this was going to happen. Then I kiss you in front of my burning car.
We should play strip poker. You can strip and I'll poke you.
Whew! You're hotter than a data center with an old school cooling system.
Hey Girl, Do you love water? That means you love 80% of me!
I know a mystery even Detective Conan can't solve: The mystery of how you got so damn beautiful!
Now I know why Solomon had 700 wives...Because he never met you.
So how do lesbians have sex? It's too complicated. I'd have to show you.